All of LIfe is a Decision

From the first time you choose Cheerios(c) over toast, your life has been a series of decisions. Some are seemingly small such as what to have for breakfast or what to wear.  Others are of the more weighty variety like who do I marry or what will I do with my life.

Decisions also have consequences.  If we eat spicy food at midnight, we may pay with indigestion.  If we marry an incompatible individual then the consequences may be unhappiness or even divorce.  Unfortunately, most of us take decision making quite lightly and use the eeny-meeny-miny-moe approach.

My series of books take on 13 of our major decisions that change our lives, our marriages, our communities, and eventually our world.  How we act or react to life or how we anticipate life makes a difference in all of our relationships. 

When we display anger, unforgiveness, isolation, and guilt, it may be time for a deeper probing of what is going on in our lives.  I want to take this journey with you.  It is one I have experienced and so have many of my colleagues.

Be Generous

People love to get stuff, especially free stuff.  Americans are famous for their big cars, big houses, big food portions, big everything.  But I wonder if that is true of our hearts.  We tend to be generous with everything but ourselves.  I am putting myself on the hook too.  It is easier to be generous with a few dollars than with myself or my time.  Chapter 6 of 13 Decisions That Will Change Your Life introduces some folks you don't know but their generosity will inspire your life.

Satan's Toolbox

Everyone has a resource they pull from.  Writers read voraciously and persuade, create worlds, motivate, or make us laugh.  Carpenters use their hammers, planes, and blueprints to fashion cathedrals. 

Satan is like that.  But he isn't clever enough to use innovative methods.  Instead he digs into our conscious and subconscious minds, invades our dreams, and finds enough emotional baggage to be a guilt trip agent.

Don't fall for it.  Let your toolbox be filled with love, peace, and joy.

Use Your Abilities

A double amputee wrote, "You're not disabled by the disabilities you have, you are able by the abilities you have."  A great attitude from a great athlete.

Oscar Pistorious is the fastest man with NO legs.  His awards would fill a room.  He is only one example of patience and perseverance.  He decided that his disability would not define him. 

As the motto of paraolympics asks, "What's your excuse?"

Covenant or Contract?

When Tim, my husband, performs a marriage ceremony he often talks about the difference in a contract or a covenant.  Contracts assume skepticism, contain no trust, and can be broken.  On the other hand, a covenant is assuming permanence, trust and faithfulness, plus an idea of eternity.  Covenant making with another individual is a serious business and not to be taken lightly.  No bed of roses or promises of smooth sailing but an oath of faithfulness, inter-dependence, love, and forgiveness.  Think about your relationships - are they contracts or covenants? 

Tough Love

Forgiving someone close to me was the hardest thing I have ever done.  Of course like the Tom Hanks character in "A League of Their Own" said (in reference to baseball), "If it was easy everyone would do it."  And therein is the rub. 

In order to forgive you must bear the pain, decide to let the wound heal, vow to put it behind you, and offer love to the offender.  Not a bad recipe if you only have to see that person once or twice a year, but what about at all the family holidays, birthdays, Christmas, every other weekend, at funerals, gravesides, and all social events?  Each time takes a piece of your soul.  That is unless, "you forgive your brother from your heart" (Matthew 18:35 NIV)

And while you are dispensing grace to another, don't forget to take a heaping helping for yourself.  Forgiveness and grace combined are the antidote to bitterness and a life filled with fear.

Loving Your Neighbor

Love. Love. Love. Love. The gospel is a word is love.  Love thy neighbor as thy brother.  Love. Love. Love.

I grew up singing that song in vacation Bible school.  Sounds easy and when I was young I thought it was.  Love to me was kissing my parents goodnight, getting treats from my Grandfather, sitting on Santa's knee, or being praised for good grades.  What's not to  love?

As an adult, I learned that not everyone loves,  I also learned not everyone is lovable.  That's when the command to love is hard to obey.  Later one I heard someone say, "remember like and love are not the same thing." 

That was freeing.  Jesus never commanded us to like everyone.  But He did mention loving others a lot - a whole lot.  I have spent the last 45 years learning the difference and figuring out how to do it.