Barriers to Love

When I started writing 13 Decisions that will Change Your Life, I hadn't considered how many barriers there were to unconditional love.  As it turns out, there are many.  More seem to rear their heads every day.

Love is curtailed by distrust or mistrust.  We've all experienced betrayal and the bitterness it leaves.  Love is unable to live in an atmosphere of unforgiveness.  Roots of  malice burrow into our lives and take years of diligence to get rid of.

Love closely related to joy and a zest for living.  Neither is possible if a scimitar is poised over our head.  Purging grudges, putting away hard feelings, and defusing feuds unbars the road to love.  Unfortunately cleared pathways don't always stay clear, so this demolition must be a constant chore.   Don't put off your spring cleaning so love can blossom. 

Ignoring Failure

If you were raised in a home with perfectionists as I was, failure is the absolute be-all and end-all most humiliating experince you could experience.  Bad grades were a reflection on the family.  Behavior was to be on the utmost par.  Nothing could spot a perfect record at school or in the neighborhood.  "Be a lady" is the southern matra heard from the hospital nursery to the nursing home.  Not necessarily a bad thing, but somewhat crippling if you fail in any realm of your life.

And you will fail.  Failing isn't fatal.  Failing can be the stepping stone to the next big thing.  And failing doesn't mean you will never attain the goal.  You may have to be more patient, wait a little longer, take another creative route, or take a detour.  The main thing is that you keep on!  Ignore what doesn't work along with unwanted comments.  Concentrate on the goal and you will get there.

Generosity is Contagious

My grandmother was a giver.  I never left her little country farmhouse without a sack of tomatoes or jars of jelly.  She wasn't rich in material wealth but she wanted to give. Giving expressed her love.  I wonder if we think of that when we write a check to the church or share with someone in need.  Giving can salve our conscience because it's the right thing to do.  But perhaps we should reread the story in Luke 21.  Jesus commends the widow for her tiny gift because "she gave all she had to live on."  She supposedly went unnoticed but gifts done for the right motive don't go unnoticed.  The decision to be generous will change your life and the lives of those around you.

Surrender Opens Doors

Two of my favorite modern day heroines are Corrie Ten Boom and Elisabeth Eliott.  Corrie chose a prison camp rather than turn away the Jews being persecuted in her town.  She provided a haven for many before being arrested herself.  She saw her sister, Betsy, waste away and die but Corrie was faithful to her task. She surrendered but never gave up.

Elisabeth became a widow at a very young age.  Her husband, Jim, was slaughtered as he attempted to preach Christ in Ecuador.  Instead of giving up, she surrendered her life to reaching the people in that tribe. The journey was long but fruitful and proved to be a lifelong adventure.

What adventure are you missing by resisting surrender?

Satan's Toolbox

Everyone has a resource they pull from.  Writers read voraciously and persuade, create worlds, motivate, or make us laugh.  Carpenters use their hammers, planes, and blueprints to fashion cathedrals. 

Satan is like that.  But he isn't clever enough to use innovative methods.  Instead he digs into our conscious and subconscious minds, invades our dreams, and finds enough emotional baggage to be a guilt trip agent.

Don't fall for it.  Let your toolbox be filled with love, peace, and joy.

Use Your Abilities

A double amputee wrote, "You're not disabled by the disabilities you have, you are able by the abilities you have."  A great attitude from a great athlete.

Oscar Pistorious is the fastest man with NO legs.  His awards would fill a room.  He is only one example of patience and perseverance.  He decided that his disability would not define him. 

As the motto of paraolympics asks, "What's your excuse?"

I Want to Be Patient NOW

In the instant society where we live, work, and play, patience has become an antique virtue.  We nuke our food, speed to our appointments, demand faster cable and internet (guilty of all).  Perhaps the only thing we can't speed up is childbirth and C-sections are helping with that.

When it comes to the world of writing, patience and its companion, perseverance, is the only thing that will keep you sane.  David Sarnoff said, The will to persevere is often the difference between failure and success.